just another day

Nothing new to post really,just wanted to make an entry.
I spent most of the day on Sat with Yvonne ,Olivia and J.I went to watch he play her fist game of soccoer (it was a social gathering for her! :) )Then I met them at thier houe and J helped me to lay George to rest.
One Sunsday (mothers Day) I decided that I needed to think up something new to do with Mom for Mothers Day since the Boys arnt with me any more.So I decided that joining Mom at church would be her perfect gift.
I met her there and could see the happines in her face when she saw me.I was a fitting service for families and brought a tear to my eyes more than once(even tho Im not a religious person).
Mom asked me down to her house for dinner(first time i was there since Gary put her out....I bit my toung and agreeded to go...for her) I was happy to spend some time with her together.I even got to see her on the treadmill :) and she set up the MP3 player I gave her for mothers day so she will have music when shes on it.
I worked at 7 on monday at the hos.I called Donnie at 6:45 and takkled to Layne for a min b4 i went in to work(he had just picked them up at the airport.
Today I decided i needed to get my car in to the garage to get the wheel baring replaced.Joel took me to drop it off.I went to work at the mill around 5:30 and tried to call Mike on the way there but he was at his moms for dinner.On my way home from the mill I had a yearning to see the Boys so I went out to the trailor.Mathew wasent home(no car in the driveway) I knoched on the door...no answer(I could hear the Boys inside) but neather one came to the door.I did hear Dustans voice but couldnt tell what he said. I could see Kork on the comp through the window as I was walking down the steps.I dont know if he was on line or just on a game on the comp itself.I nocked at the window and said I love you ,but he ignored me as i said it walking down the steps.I said I love you again as I walked by the back bedroom window,no response.I got in my car and left the park.
It plays with my mind every second of the day to think that they are there every night alone.I know that they are smart, responsable,good Boys,But i cant help to be worried.I know that I worie about them being there alone...but...I am also Sooooooooo proud of how responsable they have been. They are soooooo young to be home alone with out anything happening.I am VERY PROUD of them!!!!! I know they want everyone to see how can "take care of themselves " but I know in my heart...they still need what MOM can give them! I MISS making them supper,and sitting at the table and sharing it with them.I miss hearing about their day at school.I misss teling them to brush their teeth b4 bed.And most of all I miss Tucking them in as their day comes to an end and telling them how much I love them.
I miss them soooooooooooooooooooo much,and Jade too.
I will wake up tomorrow but I will not be the me I should,why...because the ones I truly love will not be near.I still love you tho,no matter what.That will never change...EVER. xoxoxoxoxoxoxo Jade,Dustan..Kory